Get To Know Me!

Behind the name Tobey Alexander is a story of survival, self-discovery, and unapologetic neurodivergence.

Hi, I’m Gav, though many know me as Tobey Alexander, the name I write under as a novelist and screenwriter..

I’m a late-diagnosed autistic adult with ADHD, a multi-award-winning storyteller, and a qualified educator with over 20 years of experience in high-pressure operational roles. For nearly two decades, I worked in the UK’s Blue Light Services. Life-or-death decisions, constant pressure, and a lifetime of masking shaped how I survived, until I realised I didn’t have to anymore..

It took a near breakdown, and a breakthrough, to realise I wasn’t broken. I was just wired differently.

Now, I use that experience to help others stop hiding who they are, and to build environments where they don’t have to..

DISCOVER MY AWARDS & RECONITION

🔥 The Turning Point

For most of my life, I was performing. I wore whatever mask the world needed just to get by humour, control, overworking, people-pleasing. It looked like success on the outside. Inside, I was burning out.

My diagnosis didn’t give me an excuse. It gave me a framework. I wasn’t failing. I was just wired differently.

That moment forced me to stop surviving and start understanding who I actually was. From there, everything changed.

Alongside my BSc in Psychology from Nottingham Trent University and my professional teach,ng qualifications (Level 3 Award in Education and Training, and TAQA), I began applying my experience to reshape how training and leadership could better support neurodivergent adults. I wanted to create the kind of environment I never had, one that made space for how we actually think and work.

✍️ Storytelling Became Survival

Writing was never a hobby. It was how I made sense of the world. It gave me control when everything else felt chaotic.

Through books and screenplays, I found a way to explore identity, resilience, trauma, and purpose. I wasn’t just telling stories. I was writing the things I needed to hear, and it turned out other people needed them too.

Since publishing my first book in 2015, I’ve used storytelling as a tool for connection, reflection, and public change. Nearly 30 international screenplay awards later, I’m still writing for the same reason I started: to feel less alone, and help others do the same.

🎤 Speaking Honestly

I’ve spoken at national conferences and frontline units across law enforcement and defence, including:

East Midlands Special Operations Unit (EMSOU)
Ministry of Defence
Civil Nuclear Constabulary
Lincolnshire and Derbyshire Police
Keynote speaker at New Scotland Yard for the Neurodiversity Celebration Week 2025

I talk about what it means to hide your identity in plain sight. About masking until you lose track of who you really are. And about the strength that comes from facing your mind instead of fighting it.

These aren’t motivational soundbites. They’re real experiences, shared so others don’t have to learn the hard way.

🏔 A Mantra Forged in Fire

Between 2016 and 2019, everything hit at once. My eldest son was hospitalised. My youngest and I were both diagnosed with autism. We faced family illness, personal trauma, and more uncertainty than I thought we could carry.

But we kept going. And in one of the hardest years of our lives, my son and I trekked to Everest Base Camp when he was just thirteen. That journey became a symbol, a message we needed to believe:

You Are Your Only Limit.

That phrase became the title of my first screenplay and the backbone of everything I do, from writing to coaching to how I parent.

🧭 What Drives Me Now

Everything I create, books, keynotes, NeuroEdge, training resources, is built from lived experience.

I’m not here to tell you who to be. I’m here to help unpick the noise that told you you weren’t enough in the first place.

My mission is simple:

Help people understand their minds
Stop the pressure to perform
And build spaces where difference is respected, not hidden

Whether I’m writing about demons, supernatural heros, monsters, dystopias, or the reality of burnout, it all comes back to this: helping people feel seen.