Understanding Neurodivergent Lived Experiences

Let me be honest right from the start - understanding neurodivergent experiences isn’t as straightforward as it sounds. It’s messy, complex, and often wrapped in layers of misunderstanding and some antiquated ideas that seem rooted in the dark ages. I’ve stumbled through my own journey, tripping over assumptions and stereotypes, trying to make sense of what it means to live with a brain that doesn’t quite tick the usual boxes. If you’re here, you might be on a similar path, or maybe you’re trying to support someone who is. Either way, buckle up. This isn’t your typical dry explanation. It’s a real, raw dive into what it means to be neurodivergent.

What Neurodivergent Experiences Really Feel Like

When I say “neurodivergent experiences,” I’m talking about the day-to-day reality of living with a brain wired differently from the so-called “norm.” It’s not just about diagnoses or labels. It’s about how the world feels, how interactions unfold, and how energy is spent just trying to navigate a space that wasn’t built with you in mind.

Imagine walking into a room where the lights are too bright, the noise is too loud, and everyone else seems to speak a language you don’t quite understand. That’s a snippet of what it can feel like. Sensory overload isn’t just a phrase; it’s a full-body experience. And it’s exhausting.

But it’s not all doom and gloom. There’s a unique kind of creativity and perspective that comes with this wiring. I’ve found that my brain’s quirks can be a superpower when given the right environment. It’s like having a secret weapon that only works if you know how to wield it.

Here’s a quick list of what many neurodivergent folks might experience:

• Sensory sensitivities - sounds, lights, textures can be overwhelming.

• Social navigation challenges - decoding social cues isn’t always intuitive.

• Hyperfocus or difficulty concentrating - sometimes laser-sharp, sometimes scattered.

• Emotional intensity - feelings can be deeper, more volatile.

• Unique problem-solving skills - thinking outside the box is second nature.

  
  

A calm space for sensory relief

Why Sharing Neurodivergent Experiences Matters

I’ve learned that talking openly about these experiences is crucial. It’s not just about venting frustrations or seeking sympathy. It’s about building bridges of understanding. When I share my story, I’m not just telling you what it’s like for me. I’m inviting you to see the world through a different lens. Often doing it feels really vulnerable, if not a littlw mind-melting, but I have come to learn the value of it both for those in the audience, and myself.

This openness helps dismantle the stigma that often surrounds neurodivergence. It encourages workplaces, schools, and communities to rethink how they accommodate different ways of thinking and being. And trust me, it’s not about lowering standards or making excuses. It’s about recognising that one size does not fit all.

For leaders and organisations, this means creating spaces where neurodivergent individuals can thrive. Simple adjustments can make a world of difference:

• Offering flexible work hours or remote options.

• Providing quiet zones or sensory-friendly environments.

• Using clear, direct communication instead of vague instructions.

• Encouraging diverse thinking and problem-solving approaches.

  
  

These aren’t just nice-to-haves. They’re essential for unlocking the full potential of every team member.

Tools to support focus and sensory needs

What is considered neurodivergence?

You might be wondering, what exactly falls under the umbrella of neurodivergence? It’s a broad term that covers a variety of neurological differences. Some of the most commonly recognised include:

• Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)

• Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

• Dyslexia

• Dyspraxia

• Tourette Syndrome

• Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

  
  

But it’s not just about clinical diagnoses. Neurodivergence can also include other cognitive and learning differences that don’t always fit neatly into categories. The key is recognising that these differences are natural variations in human neurology, not deficits or disorders to be “fixed.”

Understanding this helps shift the conversation from “What’s wrong with you?” to “What makes you unique?” It’s a powerful mindset change that can transform how we support and empower neurodivergent individuals.

If you want to dive deeper into this topic, I highly recommend checking out this resource on neurodivergence for more insights and stories.

Puzzle pieces symbolising diverse neurological profiles

Navigating Challenges and Celebrating Strengths

Living with neurodivergent experiences means facing challenges head-on, but it also means celebrating strengths that often go unnoticed. For me, it’s been a rollercoaster of learning how to manage sensory overload, social anxiety, and executive dysfunction. But it’s also been about discovering my knack for storytelling, creativity, and empathy.

Here are some practical tips that have helped me and might help you or your organisation:

1. Create routines but allow flexibility - predictability can reduce anxiety, but rigid schedules can be stifling.

2. Use visual aids and clear instructions - they help with processing and memory.

3. Encourage self-advocacy - empower individuals to express their needs and boundaries.

4. Celebrate small wins - progress isn’t always linear, and every step counts.

5. Foster a culture of patience and understanding - mistakes and misunderstandings are part of the journey.

   
   

Remember, it’s not about “fixing” anyone. It’s about recognising and valuing different ways of thinking and being. When organisations embrace this, they don’t just become more inclusive - they become more innovative and resilient.

Embracing Authenticity and Moving Forward

If there’s one thing I want you to take away from this, it’s this: embracing neurodivergent experiences means embracing authenticity. It means showing up as your true self, quirks and all, and finding spaces where that self is valued.

For leaders and organisations, this is a call to action. It’s about creating environments where neurodivergent individuals don’t have to mask or hide parts of themselves to fit in. It’s about listening, learning, and adapting.

I’m still on this journey myself, learning every day how to navigate the world with my unique brain. But I’m hopeful. Because the more we share, the more we understand, and the more we create spaces where everyone can thrive.

So, what’s your next step? Maybe it’s starting a conversation, making a small change at work, or simply being kinder to yourself. Whatever it is, remember - you’re not alone, and your experience matters.

Let’s keep the conversation going.

Tobey Alexander’s blog